"Checking all these different portals, just to get rejected by 7 technologies"

Lately I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with all of the ways in which you can have contact with someone. And how creepy some of our different portals of communication can be. 

Conversations start with messaging on POF... which is not a very good chat set up. What makes it worse is that if you're online trying to chat with someone, there is no way to appear "offline." So, you appear online to others, come up faster in searches, and end up with a lot more messages.

As the conversations start to progress, there is usually a push to communicate in some other fashion. I don't usually initiate, but I am happy when it happens. There are a few different ways this can go.

1. iMessage (texting)

The next step is generally texting, and I am usually okay with giving them my phone number so that we can text. It's a lot easier than using the POF website, and pretty much harmless.

Side note - It turns out that of the 13 guys I have texted, NINE of them have iPhones! That's 70%! Kinda crazy if you think about it. 

So for those of you who don't have iPhones, when you text with another iPhone, you use iMessage, which doesn't use texts from your plan (uses data/wifi instead, and can be used when there is no cell signal if you have wifi) and shows up as this pretty blue color. Sometimes with iPhones, people give read receipts, which show up like this: 

Or if it's the same day, it shows the time instead of the date.

Also, it only shows the read receipt for the last text message read. So you can't look back and see when each one was read. At least not that I know of.

I turn read receipts off on my phone. I don't necessarily want people to know that I read their texts.

2. Facebook

#12 was the first to bring up connecting on Facebook, but I chose to text with him instead. There is a lot on Facebook that I'm not sure I want someone to know if I don't know them. 

However one day I was greeted by this:

And it was #5. And then the next day it was banjo boy. I was in Republic with Aunt Patty (poster weekend) and she didn't think there was a problem with accepting their friend request. 

#5 and I were already texting, so I just told him that I wasn't ready for Facebook stalking (I actually told him that). I did decide that I was OK with Facebook stalking banjo boy (maybe more curious about him), and so his request was accepted, and we started chatting via Facebook. Facebook also gives read receipts, but that's not all. This is where social media starts to get creepy. 

First, I discovered that if you search in the chat section for a person, it gives you some idea of when they were last on Facebook.

I haven't totally figured out their system, but from what I can understand, green means they are actively on Facebook  It might mean on a computer. I don't know about the cell phone, but the creepiest one is the cell phone with time next to it. Like in this tells me that Mike Slagle was on Facebook 3 hours ago. So if I saw he read my text 5 hours ago, but then I look and see he was active on Facebook 3 hours ago, I might start to wonder, why hasn't he written me back yet! He saw my Facebook message and was even on Facebook after that! 

Or another example would be that Mike hasn't responded to my text message that I sent him 20 minutes ago, but Facebook tells me he was on Facebook on his phone 12 minutes ago....so I know he was on his phone. He had to have seen my text! I think you can see where this is going. 

But it's not even the creepiest part yet.

Facebook shows you where the person was when they sent you the message, if they sent it from their phone. Don't believe me?

Now I know where Banjo Boy lives!

3. Voxer

Voxer is a walkie-talkie app. Apparently when #12 added me in his phone, I also appeared in his Voxer since we both have Voxer. Kinda crazy how everything is linked up like that and it just knows it have it. So we started Voxing (?) and it turns out that Voxer also shows the location! Creepy again!

Now I know where Rob (#12 not #5) lives!

4. Snapchat

Snapchat is an app that lets you view a photo or video for ten seconds or less (sender can determine the amount of time), and then it is deleted. I'm sure we can all guess what the programmers had in mind (designed by college kids in 2008). Snapchat doesn't have quite the creeper status as the rest, but it does let you know if the snap was viewed, if that person took a screenshot of it, and the top three people that all of your friends snapchat with.

Some other forms of communication that don't get mentioned:

5. email

(got one from #3)

6. phone call

(#4, #5)

7. voice message

(got one from #4)

8. regular mail

(none, but I like mail)

9. FaceTime

(the Skype of apple products)

(#5)

10. showing up uninvited at my house 

(since they know approx where I live thanks to facebook!)

(also, none yet!)

So here we are, with all of these different forms of connecting with each other. It can be exhausting. And most have phone notifications, so you know when someone has messaged you, or send you a voice thing on voxer, or a snap chat, or a facetime request, etc., but somehow I still find myself checking them, just in case I missed the notification!

Aaaaaannddd...In closing, I think this video pretty much sums it up.

(From He's Just Not That Into You)

Banjo Boy (or He Who Shall Not Be Numbered), and My Personal Ad.

A few weeks ago I started messaging online with Banjo Boy. He looked cute and said in his profile that he plays banjo in a bluegrass band, which is pretty cool. 

Here's Kenny & Amanda Smith band:

While I was working on the chart with Aunt Patty (see yesterday's post), we thought about adding him but at that point in time, we weren't texting, which is how they get numbered, so banjo boy became He Who Shall Not Be Numbered. (If he were numbered, he would be #14, since we're skipping 13 in case it's bad luck). He facebook friended me, which eventually I decided was good so that I could do a more thorough internet stalking of him. Looks like he mostly just plays his banjo a lot, or that's what most of his pictures are of. Sort of makes me wonder if he has TIME for anything (anyone?) else but I suppose I don't want anything too serious right now anyway.

Which brings me to, what do I want? After Uncle Rob outlined HIS ideal man for me, I thought I should think about that a bit for myself. I purposefully left that part out of my profile. I just put out there who I am and let people come to me. However this is what I've come up with for a personal ad:

Looking for someone who is fun, has a good sense of humor, is a bit outdoorsy, somewhat spontaneous but also likes to plan things out. You should be manly and also not too skinny. You should take care of your body but not be a crazy gym rat, and I'm not too into cyclers or mountain biking. I can't explain it, but it's just not something I find attractive. I would like to find someone to go camping with, cook dinners with, take random day trips or weekend trips with. A little dorky, but also cool, interesting, and have SOMETHING in your life that you are really excited and/or passionate about.

I'm not too into "sweetheart" or roses. Especially in the beginning, and definitely not if I haven't met you and we are only talking online.   

Remember, I am a Gemini. We are the twins of the zodiac. Sometimes I may seem fickle, so you might need to work a little bit to keep it interesting for me. They also say we are a bit two faced...I like to take that as being multi-faceted. "On one hand, the Gemini can be outgoing, flirtatious, communicative, and ready for fun, fun, fun. Yet when the other twin is present, you can find this air sign contemplative, serious, restless, and even indecisive." It would be to your advantage to learn how to decide which one of me is present very quickly. So you should probably be a pretty perceptive person. Lots of people compare Geminis to butterflies, so be careful not to try to contain me too much. Think of a butterfly net, not a glass jar. However, life is never boring with a Gemini around, and I've never met a Gemini who I didn't like. 

I would like someone who would want to be casually exclusively dating for the first few months (this means we are not serious but we are not dating anyone else). After 3-4 months, you should be begging me to be your girlfriend - but not before then. Then about a year and a half later, you'll be wanting to propose to me, so you should probably start saving up now. Actually you can make that two years, it doesn't hurt to make me wait a little bit.  

Deal-breakers: smoking (weed or cigarettes); people who get wasted every weekend; not wanting children; calling me "sweetheart" before we've met; trying to hold my hand, kiss me, or rub my back on the first date; being anti-religion; not liking country music; shorter than 5'7"; beards longer than 1/2"; mustaches; blonde hair;

Deal-makers: drives a truck; taller than 6'; snowboards; is a thoughtful present-giver (who doesn't like that?), close with their family; knowing how to separate colors, delicates, and fold clothes; brown hair; knows how to do home-repairs/remodels (important for the future); 

Comments? Do you think this fits me?

The Perfect Man

I visited the Slagle's for Labor Day weekend. Aunt Patty, her friend Katy, and Katy's daughter Jenna made this poster for me. They hung it one the back of the door to the bedroom that I was staying in. Then we took it down and finished filling it out.

Any information on the poster she got off of the blog, and our conversations. #11 is Uncle Rob's creation - the perfect man. It says something along the lines of: 

Owns a boat, has a 100,000 acre elk ranch in Montana, cabin on the Kenai peninsula, likes to shrimp, crab, and clean fish. Won the lottery.

And there you have it, the perfect man.